My Evaluations and Grades (So Far) of the 2011 Seattle Mariners

Well, so far this season, at May 31^st, the Mariners are 27-26, one game above .500. I have to admit I never thought that they would be above .500, albeit by one game, this late in the season. It’s time to grade each player (that is currently on the roster) and then give grades to each part of the team (infielders, outfielders, starting pitchers, relief pitchers, coaches). Then one final overall grade at the end.

Infielders:

Miguel Olivo, Catcher
Miguel started out really slowly, hitting under .200 for over a month. But in the past few weeks when the Mariners have gotten hot, so has he. Every time the Mariners score 4+ runs, he seems to have been in the thick of things. His defense has been so-so, but I’m most impressed with how he’s worked with the pitchers.
Grade: B-

Chris Gimenez, Catcher
Not only a backup catcher, but he can play 1^st base and the outfield as well. He hasn’t played a ton, but he has filled in quite nicely when Olivo needed a day off. He isn’t our catcher of the future, but he could be a very capable backup in the next few years to come for us.
Grade: C+

Justin Smoak, First Baseman
Smoak has had an up and down season so far, but when he’s been up, he’s been great. He leads the team in home runs and RBI’s and is as a result, the Mariners best power hitter. He got his average near .300 at one point, but his recent struggles have dropped it down to near .250. I felt that at the beginning of this season we would find out if Smoak is our first baseman of the future, and so far, I think he is.
Grade: B+

Adam Kennedy, Second Baseman (and occasional First Baseman)
Every team needs a guy like Adam Kennedy. A scrappy veteran who is able to fill in when needed. The 2001 Mariners had McLemore, the 2005 Cardinals had Eckstein. Adam Kennedy has not only hit for contact, but has shown a bit of power with the bat with his 4 home runs, good for second on the team. He doesn’t need to start every day, but he is a good fill in at 2^nd and 1^st.
Grade: B+

Jack Wilson, Middle Infielder
Jack has had a very mediocre year at best. Some would say he’s no longer worth a roster spot. Jack has been outperformed by Kennedy, and has been on the bench a bit more than he’d like. Someone might be looking for a veteran middle infielder come trade deadline time, and to be honest, I don’t expect him to be a Mariner at the end of the season.
Grade: D+

Brendan Ryan, Shortstop
At first, Ryan struggled with his bat, but showed he is very capable with the glove. However, recently, he has shown his skill with a bat bringing his average up to .276. Yes, he started out slow, but he recently got promoted to the #2 spot in the order and his scrappiness and hustle makes him a good shortstop to have.
Grade: B

Chone Figgins, Third Base
To say Figgins has been a disappointment would be a huge understatement. He has been a colossal bust and a pain in the ass for the Mariners. His .190 average is pathetic, and it’s even sadder the team has allowed him the 2^nd most at-bats with that average. When a guy can’t hit for contact or power and he’s not a clubhouse leader, and he sometimes has trouble fielding, he starts becoming borderline worthless. It’s only his fat contract that is keeping him with the club and in the starting lineup (for the most part).
Grade: F

Luis Rodriguez, Utility Infielder
Luis has been a very nice guy to have on our team. He has provided a walk-off hit (which ended our longest losing streak), and has provided spot starts. He can play 2^nd, SS, or 3^rd, he has shown good speed and great defense. He’s even a switch-hitter. Not good enough to start, but definitely capable enough to be a bench player. He just needs to work on his average, which is a paltry .180 right now.
Grade: C

INFIELDERS GRADE: C+

Outfielders/Designated Hitter:

Carlos Peguero/Mike Wilson, Left Fielders
I’m grouping these guys together because they haven’t played that much. Peguero has shown power and a good arm, and Wilson has shown some great defensive skills. However, both are hitting under .200, but then again, neither of them has seen much of the plate. It just seems like neither of them is much of an offensive upgrade over Milton Bradley, although they are both much less of a headcase.
Grade: C-

Michael Saunders, Left and Center Fielder
Saunders has shown capable defense, but his offense has been horrid for the most part. He is currently hitting only .172, and at this point in his career, you have to start to wonder if he will ever find a groove and succeed. He still has time, but he cannot keep hitting under .200. At least he has stayed healthy and been able to be in the lineup at whatever outfield spot we needed him at.
Grade: D

Franklin Gutierrez, Center Fielder
We all know Franklin started out the year on the DL and has only been back for a couple weeks. So far, not too bad. He has made a few great defensive plays and has hit fairly well. It seems like he’s getting back to his old form. We know he won’t hit like Griffey, but he plays defense like him and is able to hit the ball hard every now and then.
Grade: C+

Ichiro Suzuki, Right Fielder
We know Ichiro gets off to slow starts. But he usually starts heating up by the end of May. So far, his average has dropped to .276 and he is slumping… still. It’s hard to believe we have done so well with Ichiro not performing up to his standards. Hopefully, he will have a much hotter June. Perhaps he needs a day off every now and then. He is, after all, 37 years old. I grade him hard because I expect a lot from him.
Grade: D+

Jack Cust, Designated Hitter
Jack started out real slowly. REAL SLOWLY. Didn’t get his first home run until less than a week ago. But now he has become a source of power on this team. I was starting to think “What a horrible signing by Zduriencik” but Cust has woken up with his bat. We don’t even ask Cust to play defense or run real well, we just ask him to hit and he is finally doing it. I’d give him a better grade, but his slow start took a little too long to get over. He’ll have to keep up his hitting in order to get a higher grade from me. And I expect even better hitting from a designated HITTER.
Grade: C-

OUTFIELDERS/DESIGNATED HITTER GRADE: C-

HITTERS OVERALL GRADE: C

Starting Pitchers:

Felix Hernandez
“The King” has been pretty much his usual self, although you might say not as dominant as last year. His strikeouts lead the team and he has given us the most innings. He is only 5-4 now, but he could have a better record with a better offense. He hasn’t been outstanding, but he’s been very good.
Grade: B+

Michael Pineda
What can you say about Pineda? He is a finalist for Rookie of the Year, he has drawn comparisons to his teammate, Felix, and he really has shown he could be the second part of the 1-2 punch for the Mariners. He has impressed everyone and he will only get better with experience. His 2.42 ERA is best among Mariners starters and one of the league leaders in the AL.
Grade: A

Jason Vargas
At times, he has looked like a very good #3 starter. On a rare occasion, however, he loses control and teams find it extremely easy to get hits off him. Overall, I am impressed with Mr. Poker Face here and you can’t ask for more from him. He has been as good as we could expect.
Grade: B-

Doug Fister
You see his 3-5 record and think not much of him, but his 3.24 ERA says otherwise. He has gotten poor run support, just like the rest of his fellow starters. His record should get better with luck and better offense. Overall, he has pitched well enough for us to win.
Grade: B

Erik Bedard
Erik had a rough start, but in May man did he heat up. In May he is 2-0 with a 1.04 ERA. Outstanding. At first, I was thinking “Oh boy, here we go again”, but he has really impressed me in the last month. For a #5 starter (that he is at the moment), he has been superb.
Grade: B+

STARTERS GRADE: B+

Bullpen:

Relievers not named Brandon League (David Pauley, Aaron Laffey, Jamey Wright, Jeff Gray, Chris Ray)
Our bullpen has been pretty much as impressive as our starters, at least these five guys have. Pauley and Laffey have been excellent, Wright has been great, Gray, well we just got him, and Ray has struggled but hasn’t seen too much action. It’s an odd collection of guys to say the least, but they are getting the job done.
Grade: B+

Brandon League
At first, he looked pretty good. He was 9 for 9 in saves. Then he started becoming Brandon League again. He blew four games in a row and when he struggles, he serves up homers like they’re peanuts at a ballgame. He has however regained his confidence and got back to getting saves. So an up and down year so far for him. I’d prefer it if I kept his blown saves and losses far apart, rather than grouped together. I think he would too.
Grade: C

BULLPEN GRADE: B-

PITCHERS OVERALL GRADE: B

Coaches
So far, I have been impressed with this coaching staff. Carl Willis is handling the pitchers well, and Eric Wedge has shown a lot of poise and leadership, especially when the team has struggled. If the Mariners end up with a winning record, Wedge has to be a candidate for manager of the year.
Grade: B

OVERALL TEAM GRADE: C+

Well, for a team barely over .500, a C+ grade seems pretty fair. I graded more on how they have performed as a whole, not and vs. what I expected, except in the cases of Ichiro and Felix, both of whom I expect to dominate. I have been pleasantly surprised with this team, although not too impressed. We’ll see how they fare when summer actually comes and the weather heats up.

Top 10 Harry Potter Things I Wish Had Happened, But Didn’t

10. Slytherin gets abolished/replaced with Dumbledore

Now this is something that no one really ever hoped would happen except myself. I just felt that the house of Slytherin had such a tarnished and awful history, known for producing bad wizards. I had a slight feeling the board of governors would rule to get rid of Slytherin house and replace it with another. I know that sounds a bit farfetched, but imagine if this was real life, and there was a state in a country essentially known for having bad people. Don’t you think something would be done?

What I was in favor of was abolishing Slytherin house and creating a new house, calling it “Dumbledore”. After all, Albus Dumbledore pretty much became the most important headmaster in Hogwarts history. I even thought it out: Their colors would be Orange and Blue, and their mascot would be the Phoenix. Their traits would be honesty, integrity, and devotion. Their common room would be located in a tower or in the Room of Requirement. Just an idea I had. Never thought it would come true, but I just thought it was cool.

9. Harry sees Voldemort creating a Horcrux

I know this would be gruesome and apparently a “Horrific” act must be done to create a Horcrux. But one way JKR could have revealed how to create a Horcrux is to have Harry see a memory of Voldemort creating one—either through Voldemort or perhaps a witness. It leaves a lot up to the imagination to not explain what that horrific act is, but maybe it’s better that way.

8. Harry becomes a professional Quidditch player

If Oliver Wood could become a professional Quidditch player, why couldn’t Harry? His future wife Ginny did. When he had career counseling in OotP, he told McGonagall he wanted to be an Auror. Why not tell her he wanted to be a Quidditch player? I guess he was going for something more academic, but at the same time, he still could have tried to do something he is best at. I guess he just had other things on his mind, like saving people and killing Voldemort.

7. Malfoy loses his father/Lucius Malfoy dies

It’s not that I hate the character of Lucius Malfoy, I just felt he was expendable and could easily have been killed off. I just felt that if Lucius died, he wouldn’t put so much pressure on his son to do well, and it would make Draco realize how important family and friendship is. It would have made Draco a better person and even able to form a truce with Harry, seeing as they both would have lost parents thanks to Voldemort.

6. Luna has a relationship/ends up with Neville

I’m sorry, but Luna and Neville were perfect for each other. Both were considered outsiders, oddballs, and both had “lost” at least one parent. They could have found companionship in each other and realized how similar their lives are. They even ended up with people just like them! Luna ended up with someone who works with living things (Rolf Scamander, grandson of Newt Scamander, author of “Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them”) just like Neville (future Herbology teacher). Neville ends up with a blonde oddball (Hannah Abbott), very similar to Luna. Perhaps later in life each got divorced and then found each other. Who knows.

5. Hagrid ends up with Olympe Maxime

As soon as I read GoF, I figured Maxime and Hagrid would end up together. However, they remained only friends after DH. I didn’t imagine them having kids (both were probably too old to conceive), but they at least could have been married. They wouldn’t have to even see each other that much because of Hagrid’s job at Hogwarts.

4. Neville kills Bellatrix Lestrange

She tortured his parents into insanity, so it’s natural Neville wanted revenge. I would have loved to have seen Neville get it. He gets to do something else, however, which I guess is consolation enough. It just seemed to me that Neville would be the one to kill Bellatrix.

3. Snape apologizes to Harry

In his waning moments of life, Snape did not apologize to Harry, instead focused more on giving Harry a bunch of memories. I just wish he had had time to apologize for treating him so unfairly and rudely over their six years as teacher and student. I still feel Snape had no reason to be mean to Harry—it was his father, not him, who made Snape’s life miserable. Harry did, however, forgive him, which I personally wouldn’t have been so quick to do. I wouldn’t soon forgive a teacher who made a certain class hell for me for six years.

2. Harry kills Pettigrew

Pettigrew has always been my most hated Harry Potter character, which is why I wanted Harry to kill him. I wanted him to be at the mercy of Harry again and have Harry not give him another second chance. I wanted Harry to say, “This is for selling my parents to Voldemort!” and kill him with the Avada Kedavra curse. But, as we know, Harry actually never used that curse, although he ended up getting hit by it twice. However, I just wish Pettigrew had died at the hands of someone besides his own.

1. Harry ends up with Hermione

This is something I wanted when I read books 3-5. I thought they had such a good friendship, they hardly ever fought like Ron and her do, and if there was a mutual attraction, they would have been a great couple. Harry is the perfect husband for someone ambitious and smart. He doesn’t get jealous and would be extremely supportive. However, the Ron and Hermione romantic hints came out in HBP and Harry told Ron she’s like a sister to him. But if I was Harry, Ron and I would be fighting over who gets Hermione.

Top 10 Favorite and Least Favorite Customers

As a grocery store clerk, I encounter all different types of customers—the crazy to the pleasant to the annoying—and I have certain favorites and certain types of customers I hate. First off, the Top 10 Least Favorite Customers. These are indeed in order, from the ones that bother me not as much to the ones that bother me a lot. Here they are:

10. Meticulous OCD freaks
These type of shoppers are very picky about how things are done—and will give you specific and explicit directions on what to do. In other words, these are the type of people that think they can do a better job you. They will tell you exactly how to bag things and complain when you do something against their unspoken wishes. I have some customers that tell me they want their bags bagged extremely lightly, and when I put just two cans in one bag, they say it’s too heavy. If you’re too fragile to even lift up two cans what the heck are you doing shopping on your own?

9. Cell phone addicts
Cell phone users at the grocery store only makes the list at #9 because they usually don’t really bother me at all. In my job, I have to greet and make small talk with hundreds of people, so it is nice to get a change where I don’t even have to say anything to someone who is more interested in talking to the person at the other end of their line than me. Frankly, that doesn’t bother me, because I don’t know them. My only problem is when I need to get their attention for a matter that I must address them about and they can’t hear me. Other than that, I don’t really consider it rude, but I do think they should hang up their phone in case I have to ask them something.

8. Lonely Larry’s
These are the types of shoppers that most often live alone or with pets. These people have very few people in their life to talk to, so when they go through your line they feel obliged to discuss their entire day with you—not that you care much. Of course, I have to act interested and like I care when they come through my line. These people can sometimes also fall under the type of shoppers at #4 on the list.

7. Complainers
I think everyone is annoyed by people who complain too much. I understand if some action needs to be taken (there’s a spill, there are no more produce bags, no carts, etc.), but some people find the smallest things to complain about, such as the produce not LOOKING ripe, or the carts being wet (Hey, you live in Washington, get used to it!), or their bread not soft/firm enough. I myself have learned that not everything is perfect, so I accept things for what they are and move on. Some people need to do that as well.

6. Germ-spreaders
It’s just gross when people bring their pets or shop while they are sick. They put their dogs in the child carrier section of a cart and don’t bother sanitizing afterward. They cough and sneeze all over the store spreading germs. I try to not let it bother me; I do have a strong immune system after all, but seeing these types of shoppers aggravates me because of how ignorant and inconsiderate they are towards others.

5. “I speak no English but I have needs” shoppers
I understand that some people don’t understand English. Well, sort of. Everyone that lives in the U.S. should know at least basic English. There are however some shoppers that come through my line with very little or no English and attempt to tell me they need something. It is very difficult and annoying trying to understand what they mean. If you don’t know English, go shopping with someone who does. That’s why I often see Mexican families with their kids—the parents don’t know much English, but the kids do. And sometimes, I have to talk to the kids if something arises, which is fine with me.

4. Slow as molasses shoppers
These shoppers are usually elderly, but not always. What I hate most is that they, by their lonesome, can slow up the entire store. This includes elderly people who can barely move to people who get everything wrong with WIC (Government issued checks to help people afford food and necessities for their children). I don’t link these types of shoppers to elderly shoppers, but I do link them to lazy people who probably never move at all while they are at home. Which is why Safeway came up with grocery delivery, which is what these people should probably take advantage of.

3. Impatient “Time is money” people
The exact opposite, but equally frustrating, to the shoppers above are the impatient shoppers. They try to find the fastest checker in the store because, to them, time is money. When they find you aren’t fast enough, they take the bags off your hands before you can even set them on the belt. These shoppers are always edgy and jittery and may even offer to bag their own groceries to speed up the process. Thankfully, I don’t get many of these types of shoppers, because as most people realize, grocery shopping takes time. My best advice: Don’t go grocery shopping when you have only a limited amount of time.

2. Price scrutinizers
These people can drive me up the wall. What they are most famous for at Safeway is telling you a certain item is a certain price when they have yet to put in their Safeway Club Card. Thankfully, most shoppers have shopped at Safeway before and know that, but every now and then I get a customer that doesn’t. They will insist that “those oranges are supposed to be $0.99 a lb!” and I have to calmly and patiently tell them “That’s without the club card discount, could I get your Safeway club card?” This irks me so and is all the way up at #2 because most people should know this by now. Thankfully, no one under the age of 20 really ever is one of these types of shoppers, which leads me to believe the new age of shoppers will bring people that know this certain thing about grocery shopping.

1. Shoppers from Hell
These people are the worst. They have clearly had a bad day and must do everything they can to make it so you, the checker, have a bad day too. They are so bad they USUALLY fall under #’s 10, 7, 4, and 2 on this list. They must have a perfect shopping experience or they will let you know about it. Sometimes, I call a manager to deal with them. Sometimes, I just stay silent and act as if I don’t care. Whenever I get one of these shoppers I pray that they never enter the store again. If I happen to get one a 2^nd time, I only say “Hi” and “Have a good day” without smiling. They deserve nothing more.


Well, now that that unpleasantness is out of the way, time to move on to my Top 10 Favorite Shoppers. These people either brighten my day or give me someone to talk to. Either way, if you fall under one of these categories, I like to see you come through my line.

10. People my age
It’s just nice to talk to people my own age. Plus, they hardly EVER fall under any of the categories I listed above for Least Favorite Customers. All they want is to get their food and leave. They don’t fuss over prices or complain really about anything.

9. Moms
Moms are another type of shopper I can talk to, having one myself. They usually are very patient and forgiving people, seeing as they have to deal with children all the time. Even the ones with spoiled rotten kids treat me pretty well.

8. Sports Fans
Sports fans are one of the best type of customers to talk to, especially those who share my favorite teams, the Mariners and the Seahawks. It’s easy to talk about the Seahawks and Mariners, and they don’t let their team’s misfortunes affect how they act around me. A good customer, and I love seeing all the sports jerseys.

7. Regular Customers
By “Regular Customers”, I mean customers I see all the time. I know what to expect from these people. I know how to treat them. They like me back, so they never give me a bad time. They know how deals work and how prices work, so I never have to explain it to them.

6. Sympathetic Shoppers
Sympathetic shoppers always ask me genuinely how my day is. They always express remorse that I am working. They always try to do the best they can to make my job easier, which I really appreciate. These shoppers include both men and women, and they give me the strength to get through a tough shift.

5. Pleasant people
I guess you could merge this with the above, but they are slightly different. They just like spreading their joy around. They are the complete opposite of the “Shoppers from Hell” and it’s always nice to provide a service to someone nice.

4. Coworkers
Coworkers are not only great people to talk to, but they know more than anyone how pricing and deals work, since obviously they work there. Because of that, they also happen to be some of the quickest shoppers, knowing where everything is and how to have a speedy checkout.

3. Good-looking girls
Who doesn’t like good-looking girls? *Cricket sounds* Good-looking girls are extremely nice and they—well, I won’t get into the rest. As I am a straight male, you should be able to deduce the rest of the reasoning of why I like them in my line.

2. Famous People
I haven’t had any extremely famous people in my line, but I have had Seahawks cornerback Kelly Jennings and Jason and Molly Mesnick from the Bachelor. I’ve also seen at work Walter Jones, Deion Branch, and Nate Burleson. I’ve yet to see anyone from the Mariners, but I know someday I will. They always give me something to tell others about “Hey, so-and-so just went through my line!” and I don’t embarrass them by saying I recognize them.

1. Friends/Family
I had to include this one. Friends and family treat me better than anyone. They’re very easy to talk to and it definitely helps knowing your customer. I actually haven’t had family come through my line, since family technically isn’t allowed to, or at least people you live with.

Top 10 Actresses I’d Like to See Play the Mother on HIMYM

As a huge fan of the hit CBS comedy “How I Met Your Mother”, I have thought of many actresses who I would like see play the “Mother” on the show, whenever she is revealed. I only included brunette actresses, because the it has been heavily hinted that the mother is not blonde (and probably isn't red-haired, either). Here is a list of ten, in order, from least preferable to most, that I’d like to see play the mother on the show:

10. Missy Peregrym
Positives: Looks
Negatives: Not comedic, no fuzzy feeling
Know her from: Heroes, Rookie Blue

Missy has the looks, no doubt about it. She can definitely act as well. However, she is not used to comedic roles and not too many would be a huge fan of her being the mother. I’d be ok with it, but not many would.

9. Summer Glau
Positives: Attitude, acting
Negatives: Looks, not comedic
Know her from: Terminator The Sarah Connor Chronicles

Yet another actress not used to doing comedy is Summer Glau. I just really like her. I think people COULD fall in love with her, but that’s not a sure thing. She doesn't really look like the mother of Ted’s kids, so that’s definitely against her.

8. Evangeline Lilly
Positives: Looks, Likability
Negatives: Known for playing Kate on LOST, not comedic
Know her from: Lost

I know what you’re thinking. WHAT? Kate from LOST on How I Met Your Mother? She could definitely pull of the motherly vibe and I can picture her as being in a band. Her only problem is that she is known for one role and therefore probably won’t be the mother.

7. Zooey Deschanel
Positives: Looks, acting ability
Negatives: Not very comedic, too well-known, more of a movie actress
Know her from: Yes Man, (500) Days of Summer, Elf

Suggested to me by my friend Tyler, so I had to include her. She isn’t a bad choice, but I don’t think Bays and Thomas want to cast someone as well known as Zooey Deschanel. However, if she did get the part, she would play it well. She is, after all, a talented actress.

6. Amanda Crew
Positives: Looks
Negatives: Age
Know her from: Sex Drive

Amanda Crew is only 24, but could pull off the role of a college student AND a member of a band. She would definitely be a risky choice, but it could pay off. She also looks like the female David Henrie, the “son” on the show.

5. Erica Durance
Positives: Looks
Negatives: Busy with Smallville
Know her from: Smallville, Butterfly Effect 2

Erica Durance is more than likely too busy with Smallville, but she’d be a great pick as the Mother, in my opinion. She really is the complete package. She is also ALREADY the third Canadian on this list (the other two being Amanda Crews and Evangeline Lilly). Not likely, but would be a good choice.

4. Rashida Jones
Positives: Comedic, Likability
Negatives: Too well known
Know her from: The Office, The Social Network

I know, very odd pick, but you know what? Surprisingly, she would fit the role extremely well. When you see Rashida on screen, you don’t really notice that she’s half black. Plus, she is a comedic actress and just as a side note, she graduated from Harvard. YEAH. However, she is pretty well-known which would count against her.

3. Olivia Wilde

Positives: Likability, Looks, New Yorker
Negatives: Not comedic, too well-known
Know her from: House, Tron: Legacy

Olivia Wilde is a New Yorker, as she was born there, so that certainly wouldn’t hurt getting on HIMYM. She’s not on House anymore, so all she is doing is movies. I think she could make a return to TV. Most people would love her as the Mother. I would.

2. Lizzy Caplan
Positives: Rocker vibe, acting
Negatives: Too well-known?
Know her from: Mean Girls, Cloverfield, Hot Tub Time Machine

Now we’re getting down to the serious contenders. Lizzy Caplan would be an amazing choice. She’s borderline too well-known, but who cares? She is able to be both comedic and serious and could definitely pull off someone who is in a band. I definitely would be thrilled if she was the Mother.

1. Sophia Bush
Positives: Looks, age, likability
Negatives: Busy with One Tree Hill
Know her from: One Tree Hill, John Tucker Must Die, The Hitcher

Sophia Bush is currently my #1 choice. She is one of my favorite actresses, and to have my favorite actress on my favorite TV show would be awesome. She is still busy with One Tree Hill, however, and she hasn’t done too many comedic roles. I’m sure she doesn’t want to ONLY be known as Brooke from One Tree Hill. Sophia is the complete package and in my opinion is the best choice for the Mother.